Author No. 1
Professional Copy-Paster
Steals AI research papers and rewrites them like he invented machine learning. He once "developed" an AI model by tweaking the variable names in an open-source GitHub project. Thinks ChatGPT is his personal assistant and takes credit for its responses. Dreams of giving a TED Talk on AI, but still can't explain the difference between supervised and unsupervised learning.
Author No. 2
Cybersecurity Overthinker
Believes the FBI is watching his Google searches and never uses "123456" as a password (we think). Constantly talks about "zero-trust architecture" but clicks on suspicious emails promising free Bitcoin. Has 17 VPNs running simultaneously, yet still manages to get hacked. Uses Tor Browser for everything, including checking the weather. Wears a hoodie indoors to "feel more like a hacker."
Author No. 3
Stack Overflow Fanatic
Writes code by copying from the first Stack Overflow answer he finds. Claims to be a "full-stack" developer but has only built one static HTML page. Starts every project by searching "How to build a website in 10 minutes." Spends 80% of his time debugging and the remaining 20% explaining why the bug isn't his fault. Thinks comments in code are optional because "future me will understand it."
Author No. 4
AI Prophet
Claims AI will either save humanity or destroy it, depending on his mood. Calls himself a "prompt engineer" after using MidJourney twice. Believes OpenAI is hiding a secret superintelligence, yet struggles to get Siri to set a timer. Writes blogs about AI ethics while secretly training deepfake models of celebrities for "research purposes." Wants to replace himself with an AI bot but is scared of losing his job.
Author No. 5
Tech Trend Chaser
Changes his entire career direction every time a new buzzword trends. Last month, he was a blockchain expert. This month, he's a metaverse architect. Next month? Quantum computing guru. Never actually builds anything, just writes blogs explaining why "this new technology will change everything." Invested his entire life savings in NFTs and now sells online courses to recover the losses.
Author No. 6
Dark Mode Enthusiast
Refuses to use any app that doesn’t have dark mode. Claims light mode burns his retinas. Judges people who use default Windows themes. Once spent 5 hours customizing his terminal but still can't use Git properly. Thinks coding in a dark room at 3 AM makes him more productive. Believes a black background makes his blog look "more professional."